I love my body because….

Day 4 of Mel Wells ‘self love week’ 

Today we had to finish this: “I love my body because…”

There was a time in my life when I ‘thought’ I loved my body. 

Recently I uncovered that what I thought was loving my body, was actually denying it the care and respect she truly deserved! 
In reality, I liked being the size that I was. That was it! I didn’t listen to my body!

⏩ Fast forward 8 years, a diagnosis of MS (Multiple sclerosis) & Fibromyalgia. 

🚢>β™Ώ Then the transition from the love of walking/hiking to adopting walking sticks, crutches, a wheelchair & the funkiest mobility scooter ever! And everything has changed, for the better!… I am happier now than I thought possible!

πŸ’š I was so lucky at the end of last year, continuing this year, to be a case study for my friend & yoga teacher Louise Aviles whilst she studied for her Health coaching qualification. (find Louise on Instagram: @louiseavilesyoga)

During this time, I learnt what loving my body really means! I learnt that having a thin waist, and being a size 10 isn’t actually the ONLY reasons to love your body! 

When I questioned my habits that I had when I was 6 dress sizes smaller, they definitely weren’t those that someone would have if they truly loved their amazing body

So… Why do I love my body? Haven’t you paid attention? She’s amazing! 

Everything that I’ve put her through! I haven’t been the kindest to her over the 36 years we’ve been together! 
She’s been starved, I’ve force fed her, self harmed, pushed her beyond capability, ignored her when she’s been screaming at me & she’s given me nothing but unconditional love in return!
She has enough to deal with because of how my MS affects her, so I learned new behaviours, new habits. And now I do my best to show her daily how much I love her! 

All the areas that I used to be negative about on a daily basis, I now focus on telling her why I love them!
πŸ’ͺ – My shoulders: they’re strong & able to help carry my body using crutches when my legs are to tired.
πŸ™† – My upper arms: they have the strength to enable me to enjoy different exercises

πŸ™ – My wrists: they’re strong for my Yoga & Pilates practice

πŸ‘± – My beautiful face: its unique to me!
πŸ‘™ – My chest: its where the most loyal part of me lives, my heart!

πŸ™‹ – My skin: keeps me together, stretch’s, twists & turns when needed!

πŸ˜† – My smile: it always tells the truth!

γ€° – My stretch marks: they are the marks of my amazing and beautiful journey of my life!


Thank you for reading this part of my wonderful journey! 
Love yourself for everything that you are, never for what someone thinks you should be! πŸ™

You are not only your body or only your reflection!Β 

Always! And if that’s too hard, don’t find another mirror, just stop looking!

You are not your reflection! You are so much more than anyone else can and will ever see!

You are your soul, your spirit, your smile, your heart, your warmth, your love, your charm, and much much more!

You are not only your body or only your reflection! 


Meme shared via pinterest, words are my own

Love yourself, all of yourself!Β 

If someone loves you for ALL that you are, why shouldn’t you love ALL of yourself! 

We are made to believe that we should all look and behave a certain way, to be accepted in society. 

I have never been one to follow the crowd, or to be put in a box.

Yet for so many years, since the very young age of around 10 or 11 (when I started developing my extra parts that define me as a lady, my #babylons and child bearing #hips πŸ˜‰πŸ‘™) I was always made to feel like I was fat, my shoulders were too broad, my hips too wide & my #booty too big! 

It was children the same age as me that went to the same school, they were the ones doing the name calling! 

It has taken me until the age of 36 to realise how I have, for so many years, spoken to my body in such a cruel way! I have spoken to her the same as all the children that called me fat at school! How sad is that! 


My body has for those 36 years treated me, with nothing but care and dignity! She’s showed up for me every time I’ve needed her, despite how badly I may have treated her at times! She’s always been there, curves and all! 


They’re amazing thing these bodies of ours! Lets start treating them better! Stop speaking badly of yours next time you look in the mirror. Speak to her how you would to your most beautiful friend! 


Meme shared via Pinterest, write up is my own, Vix

3rd July 2017 Oxygen therapy #6 βœ”

Yesterday, Monday 3rd July was the start of week 3. I have been doing an intensive course of Hyperbaric oxygen therapy, that I am trying for my MS fatigue. 

MS fatigue is like no other fatigue! See oxygen therapy #4 (β¬… click here) for really good explanations of MS fatigue. 

This is working! My fatigue is lifting after every session & its an amazing feeling!

As hard as it is getting myself to the appointments on time, mainly because of my anxiety. I do actually really enjoy the time that I am at Mercia MS Therapy Centre (click link to go to their website)

The staff are all really lovely & I’ve also knowticed how pleasant visitors are there as well! I no longer feel nervous about going for oxygen therapy there, in fact I look forward to it! I don’t think many people know how terrified I can be at times to go to new places & especially talking to new people! I’ve always probably seemed a very outgoing person, but heres a secret, I’m not! I have just always been good at acting! Hey, I got an A+ in GCSE drama! You know that though, right! 
One amazing thing Chloe Brotheridge, her amazing book The Anxiety Solution, my health coach/yoga teacher Louise and my MS is teaching me, that’s to always be my own authentic self! 
Sounds easy right? It isn’t! 
You must of heard of the saying ‘fake it until you make it’ that used to be me for such a long time! Even when I was diagnosed with MS, even some days now. I’m not always 100% my true self, even though I try my best to be. 
With social media playing such a big part in out lives now, its so hard to actually be 100% real! Instagram & Snapchat are probably the most fake apps to see people on! Yes I use this, yes I get drawn in and yes at 36 I’m probably classed by many ‘younger than myself’ to be ‘too old to use them!’ 

I like to use this to communicate with friends, and also to share MS awareness. I also remember to stay alert to the ‘fake it till u make it’ folk and those haters that are out there! 

Only the other day, I saw video footage of 2 girls taking photos of each other. The video must have been about 20 minutes long, and consisted of them taking it in turns to photograph each other. Sound normal? What wasn’t normal was the amount of time each of them took to make sure they were facing the correct way, (best side forward and all that) to make sure their pout was on point and the back ground was perfect! I can understand why they were doing it, but come on girls, point the camera or phone, shoot and move on! Live your life! Forget the filters, I’m terrible for using them! Alot of the time its because I don’t see colour the same as you probably do (thanks ms) so I like to change the colour, I use ‘auto tune’ alot and hope for the best. But do I really need to on just a quick snap of something silly to share with friends!??? 

I’m enjoying this version of me, the true version, so much more, and I’m using less energy in the process! 

This is because I’m not using energy pretending to be ‘ok’ all the time! That was my biggest downfall when I worked at the opticians. I loved my job, I never faked that. It was the always having to be energetic, awake & alert for patients/customers! 

So whenever you see my photos or videos, they will be as true as possible, or I’ll state filters used, etc! 

So now you can probably appreciate a little more about my life, and how hard it is to do new things! 

Sorry about that little ramble there! I get carried away with this topic!
Heres my very short video from Mondays 6th Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy…

Mentally accepting my physical limits!

Worked hard today & I don’t mean physically!

Today has been more about mentally accepting my physical limits & not ignoring my body, when she tells me it’s time to stop. When she screams because she’s getting weak & hurting. 

Its hard to accept that your body can’t do the things it used to do. It’s also hard to remember not to get angry at myself!

The good news… today I managed it! 

Today was a great day so I’m enjoying a Gin & Ginger Ale! Cheers! πŸ˜‰ 


Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy

So, today on MS world day 2017, I went for my trail session of Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy. 20 minutes breathing pure oxygen, I was in the chamber for a total of 30 minutes with 2 others also trialling the therapy.
I didn’t mind being in the chamber, it was a little daunting hearing the solid metal door being closed and the lock being tightened. My heart started to race but I soon calmed that down with my yoga breathing!
I felt a little claustrophobic because the mask has to fit so tight, I kept feeling short of breath and hearing yourself breathing is very off putting! 

Eventually I regulated my breathing but only for a short time, it was every time I heard the 2 other people’s breathing change, that’s when I would notice my own breath again. Once more I tried yoga breathing (Pranayama) but soon realised I didn’t need to inhale quite as deeply with the mask on!
There is an option of wearing a hood instead of a mask. So you basically look like you work in the forensic department​ at the FBI! πŸ™ŠπŸ˜‚
The session was soon over but I’m not sure how quickly the full one hour session would pass!
An intensive course is recommended when first starting, which is 16 sessions over 5 weeks. Each session costing Β£16 for MS patients and Β£45 for short term conditions! Gulp!! 

Β£16 doesn’t sound much but when you have 3 sessions a week for 5 weeks, it soon adds up.

This price is heavily subsidised through the charities fundraising as its actual cost should be Β£50 per person! 
I did actually notice a little less cog fog after the 20 minute session which I wasn’t expecting to feel any different.
I shall do some more thinking about this treatment & if I think I could stand being in there for a whole hour?


Photo is my own, as are the words

I forgive you for all the heartache you put me through 18-19 years ago

When you’re directed to  the only free isle in the supermarket, you look up and see that the cashier is your ex! 

In that split second you make the choice to stay and start unpacking the trolley! 

She see’s you and flushes! That’s right Vix, you got this, just another person! 

Conversation starts as she packs your bag for you. You talk back in a normal tone, just pleasantries. Forgetting everything that happened in the past, I might have poor short term memory recall skills but my long-term memory is perfect!  
In my head I tell her I forgive her for everything! Because everything that happened 18-19 years ago, shaped who I am today and for that I am grateful​! 

Anyone that knows me from that time in my life, I’m sure you will remember my attitude towards the situation! 

So you will know how momentous this mornings events are! 
This confirms to me that my health coaching sessions are paying off and I am becoming a better version of myself! 

Thank you @louiseavilesyoga 


All memes shared via Pinterest , all words are my own

Family weekend of quilt free fun!

What an amazing weekend! 

We ate what we wanted, drank what we wanted, took selfies with no make up on, laughed so much we might have pee’d a little and just basically had a flipping incredible time!

I don’t feel guilty about it, neither am I going to punish myself by not eating or exercising until I’ve worked off those extra calories, (frankly that would be impossible!) 
I may think about cutting back a little but it won’t be much different to what I ate/drank before! 

(She says with a cookie in her hand!… Hey its ok, its gluten free! πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‚)
Life is all about balance!


Shared via instagram, words are my own